“As kids we’re not taught how to deal with success; we’re taught how to deal with failure. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. If at first you succeed, then what?” – Charlie Sheen

You’re at the movies. The lights go down and the film begins. You look to your left, and who would you love- more than teachers love the Common Core- to be sitting by your side, as his strong jaw and flawless hairline glisten in the light of the screen? That’s right, ladies. You want Mr. ‘Most Likely to Succeed.’ You want the manliest man on the face of the planet. You want the guy that distracts everyone from the movie because he’s so incredibly successful and good-looking. You want the very person Charlie Sheen spoke of when he asked, “If at first you succeed, then what?” You want Marc Francis Cotter—The Original Marcy Marc, MC Flextastic, Love Guru, Marc Cotter.

So what’s the reason the Class of 2014 decided to bestow the prestigious title of ‘Most Likely to Succeed’ upon this living legend? Is it due to his early display of talent in the worlds of acting and directing? Is it because every teacher in the building, administration included, can’t help but love him? Or could it be those unforgettable 22’s that just never fail to draw our attention away from whatever it was that we were doing?

He’s smooth, cool, spicy… yet tender, and most importantly- listen up, freshmen girls- single. This kid has got it all. Get a good look while you can, WHB, because this nutty Irishman is bound for success and he’s not letting anyone or anything get in the way of his dreams. He’s got a lot going for him and a lot of girls going after him; now let’s find out why.

First off, it takes a lot for your entire class to unanimously decide that you, out of everyone in the grade, are the most likely to be successful. The teenage heartthrob believes he was chosen because “…people know I have an internship in film production.” That, and the fact that he tends to “…be a kiss up to most teachers and other people.” Oh, and lets not forget the all-important, “I have a way with words.” Tell us something we don’t know, Rico Suave.

But what exactly is it that Marc will succeed at? Amongst other things, Marc plans to “…be an acclaimed actor/director and make a lot of money.” But wait, there’s more. After all, this is Marc Cotter we’re talking about. “I plan to have a Victoria’s Secret girlfriend…or at least date one of them.” Hold the phone. This doesn’t sound like something someone bound for success would say. “Well, for a short amount of time, maybe even for a day. I could take them to like Starbucks or something.” Great, but why go through all that trouble? To this, Marc offered one of the most insightful responses our generation has ever heard. “Just to say I did,” he said, with the smile of a champion on his face.

Success, however, stems from passion. For Marc, it’s, “Acting. I’m very passionate about what I do and I take my work very seriously.” Also, “I’m passionate about my upkeep in the sense of how I look– weight-wise and style-wise.” But most importantly, “My family.” That’s right, ladies, he’s a family man. It’s almost too good to be true.

But what actually is success? If you think your answer is the only correct one, think again, because you’re about to hear it from the man himself. In the poignant yet incredibly simple words of Marc Cotter, “Happiness is success.” Yeah. Let that one sink in for a bit. It’s actually quite reMARCable.

Marc is a student, teenager, and an ordinary person just like the rest of us… but maybe we could all learn a thing or two from someone who has won over the hearts of the entire senior class, and the occasional freshman girl here and there. When asked if he had any advice for aspiring actors, or teenagers in general, Marc had some very honest and heartfelt things to say. “Don’t spend time making yourself look good in school, you know, doing a bunch of clubs and all that stuff.” Instead, he feels that you should, “Take something you’re passionate about. Find it and pursue it. Give it 100%.” But most of all, to work your way to the top and be voted ‘Most Likely to Succeed,’ “No matter what anyone says, follow your heart.” Take a moment to compose yourself, grab a tissue, and wipe away those tears of pure joy and admiration as they roll down your face.

His wisdom is unparalleled, his outlook on life is unique, and he’s not afraid to express how he truly feels, with such unforgettable statements as, “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world.” Watch out, Mr. Hoyt– looks like you (and your new mullet) have got some competition.